Five Signs That You Should Move On
Feel Like a Muse (even if your guy isn't a poet)
Have you ever found yourself involved with a guy not knowing where you stand with him? The ups and downs can be very frustrating. You may be excited about your relationship, but a part of you may feel that something is not right. He doesn't appear as enthusiastic as you are. Perhaps he is less expressive than you are. Or, it could be that he likes to take it slower. What if he is just not that into you? How do you know? What are the signs that you should move on?
It’s hard to make this decision when you are emotionally invested because we all tend to look at things through rose-colored glasses. We usually see what we want to see, and we find evidence for that, while slowly dropping our standards one by one. Soon enough, you wind up in a relationship that goes nowhere while you are the only one trying to make it work. Let's not go there. Read more about the signs that he is not your man.
Important Exceptions and Considerations
These are some basic indicators that you should look for. Of course, you need to make your own decision about the relationship and know the reasons why you stay or why you leave. Compare these signs with signs that he may be your man. You will get a deeper understanding of how to find a partner.
You will gain awareness of what it takes to be happy in a relationship. You will understand that you shouldn't be in a position to be the sole carrier of the relationship. A man who wants to be with you will show you that he is your man even if he is less expressive or needs more time.
Some men may have a tendency to withdraw when they start getting emotionally closer to you. That doesn't mean that they are not right for you.
When You Should Move On
He Contacts you Suddenly and not Consistently
This basically means that he doesn't make an effort to plan for you two. He may call when he is horny, or you are just an afterthought when his other plans didn’t work out.
Ouch! That sucks. It’s painful to realize this, but it’s so liberating. You don’t have to continue emotional investment in this guy anymore. Don’t take it personally. It happens to all of us. And, if you want such a relationship, it's fine. You may be interested in something casual at a certain point in your life. No judgment needed.
He Flakes Frequently
What this means is that he is not really invested emotionally. He basically doesn’t prioritize you. If something more interesting comes up, he will drip you easily.
Of course, he may be busy, but he also can plan. What about you? You are busy too, and you are willing to make plans to see him. So, remember, you deserve someone who prioritizes you just as you prioritize him. Be liberated by knowing this instead of taking it personally.
If you are looking for a lasting relationship, this is definitely one of the signs that you should move on. If you are OK with a casual relationship, then he may be your man for now.
He Doesn't Show Interest or Support When You Need Him
This one is really a significant indicator. It's not only a measure of how much he cares about you but also talks about what kind of man he is. If he doesn't show support to you when you are in some kind of trouble, it tells you a lot about him.
High-value men are caring and they would do anything for a woman they care about. If he is interested in deepening a relationship with you, he would be eager to show that he is there for you.
When he doesn't, it's not only a sign that he is not your man but maybe you wouldn't recommend him to anyone.
He Evades Discussion When You Express Your Dissatisfaction
When you express your dissatisfaction, he avoids conversation and tells you that you are too needy, sensitive, etc. It's gaslighting at it's best. Sliming you with attributes and making you feel shitty when in fact he knows that he is not your man.
Instead of owning it up and being explicit, he is evading the conversation not worrying that he is hurting you.
He doesn’t want to discuss it in any detail. He basically doesn’t want to proclaim anything and he really doesn’t want to reflect on his behaviors because he is not emotionally invested.
This is definitely one of the big signs that he is not your man.
He Doesn't Introduce You to His Friends or Family
You may be dating for three or four months, and he still doesn’t introduce you to his friends or family. When you hang out, it’s always only two of you. If he was emotionally invested, he would be eager to introduce you to his friends and family.
You would feel that he is proud to be with you, and he would be so happy to introduce you to his folks. If he is not, it's a major red flag.
He may only see you like a casual relationship. As I already said, it's important that you don't take it personally and feel bad about yourself. He just simply may not be ready for a serious relationship. It's really not you. It's him.
These are the signs that you should move on. Let me know if you have any other ones to add.
My friend, I know this is painful, but the truth is liberating too. At least now you know what to look for and you know what you don’t want. You want someone who’s equally happy to be with you as you are to be with them. You deserve it.
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