Two Mistakes Powerful Women Make When Looking for Soulful Love
Feel Like a Muse (even if your guy isn't a poet)
If you are like me, you want a special kind of love, soulful love and deep emotional connection with your partner. I mean, when we go through so much trouble to find love, why not allow yourself to love fully, with the whole heart? I believe this is the ultimate life fulfillment, to love fully.
It Can Be Lonely on the Path to Soulful Love for Powerful Women
Now, if you want to be on this kind of path, you need to remember one thing. It can be lonely on this path, and you may have to kiss a few frogs that will not convert into a prince. When this happens, so many women lose confidence and hope. This may be especially the case for powerful women, high achieving women. If you are one of these women, you are most likely raised to feel highly responsible for various outcomes even if it's not their doing.
You may also be highly attuned to others' feelings, needs, and desires, while neglecting your own. Many women don't even know their feelings. They often find themselves fuming with various emotions without many words to express them. It could be that due to the upbringing where there was no space for their emotions.
Because of this focus on personal achievement and perfectionism, powerful women struggle in relationships. If you are a high achieving powerful woman, you may be striving for ultimate soulful love. And you should. Why would you settle for anything else.
Mistakes That Cost You Precious Time and Energy
Unfortunately, your perfectionism and high self-criticism will most likely cause you to make these two mistakes that will cost you time and cause you heartbreak.
Taking It Personally When Things Don't Work Out
What happens here? You go out on a date after finally meeting someone who can write a solid sentence on their online profile. After having a decent conversation, you are somewhat unsure if you like him. Yet, you are willing to give him a chance because he said that he is interested in meeting up again. Then, he never follows up.
You may start loosing hope. For God's sake, you didn't even like him so much, and yet he is the one who flaked on you. Your mind may go into the downward spiral of thinking of what could be wrong with you. Were you too open? Perhaps you are not attractive enough? Oh, it must be that you are somehow too intimidating for him. "Yes...Men are intimidated by successful women," you probably think.
Technically, you really have no idea of why he didn't call you. Maybe he is not ready for a relationship. Perhaps, his ex called, and he is tangled into that joy. Maybe aliens abducted him. Who knows?
Then, after all this self-abusive thought patterns, you may spiral down into one more mistake.
Thinking That Having High Standards Is Wrong
It's not difficult to understand how negative experiences may lead you to this conclusion. Perhaps, you should lower your standards? I say "no" to that, Trying to make it work with people that you don't even like will cause you to feel pretty depleted. Relationships born from such unions, are usually not successful.
It is important to be able to confidently know when someone is right for you. There are specific guidelines that I recommend.
For now, it's important that you start by changing these two mistakes. They will sabotage your own goals and cause you to dishonor yourself.
Stay on Your Course on the Path to Soulful Love
Let’s do this the way it’s supposed to be done. First, keep in mind that other people may not be ready for the kind of love you seek. And that is fine! They are not narcissistic; or bad people. They are just not your partner. It’s important to know how to see this and let them go, wishing them well.
To make a crude comparison, a Ferrari dealer doesn’t try to convert someone who is shopping for Toyota, or any other car. Similarly, when you see a man who is not ready for the kind of love you want, don’t waste your energy trying to convince him that he should love you in the way you want him to love you.
Women who are happy in relationships and life in general never compromise themselves to make it work with someone who’s not even right for them. When you do this, you wind up resentful and you lose hope that it is possible to be happy in love.
So, why not go after what you truly want? I want to encourage you to keep your high standards. When you keep high standards for yourself, you make this world a better place for the future generations. You become a secure love creator. You teach the world how to treat you and you show them what genuine connection is. The world needs more of secure love and connection, and you can choose to become a secure love creator starting with yourself.
So, here are some questions for you. They will help you feel more solid about yourself and know what your standards are. No more feeling poorly about yourself
- What kind of love you want for yourself?
- What kind of love are you ready to offer to your partner and the world in general?
- Do you have this defined? Maybe for now you only know what you don’t want, and that's OK.
Answering these questions will help you figure out what you want and how to recognize that.
If you are tired of emotionally detached men who keep you waiting and wondering and want to feel like you have the choice of quality men trying to book a date with you, I can help you get there.
Is relationship coaching right for you?
I offer online relationship coaching for high achieving women interested in sincere high quality men, men ready to give you their heart.